As anyone who has been on my sites for very long knows, I have the utmost respect for Dr. Omar Minwalla and his work with Partners of Sex Addicts and his ability to recognize and assess for Personality Disorders in Sex Addicts.
He has written a wonderful article on his site that I think anyone who is or has been in a relationship with a Sex Addict will appreciate.
You can read his article by clicking the link below:
Thirteen Dimensions of Sex Addiction-Induced Trauma (SAIT) among Partners and Spouses Impacted by Sex Addiction ©
JoAnn
I feel like Dr. Minwalla’s a ROCK STAR! That’s why I said entering this website that I felt “Misunderstood.”
5 years of gaining an informal Ph.D on Infidelity I still felt I needed a “Witch Doctor” even with great therapists, huge supports SOMETHING WAS MISSING. I did not feel my experience was validated until I read a NYT article by Anna Fels called “Great Betrayals.” Watched Robert Weiss’s video “Internet Sex. Infidelity and Working with Betrayed Spouses,” read Barbara Steffens and Marsha Means “Your sexually Addicted Spouse.” (and of course many other wonderful people like Frank Pittman, Peggy Vaughan) But when I found Minwalla’s Thirteen Dimensions of Sex-Induced Trauma Among Partners and Spouses Impacted by Sex Addiction. Felt my “VOICE” was finally heard.
However truly believe there are people who will read this article and say “But My Spouse Is Not A Sex Addict,” and that may well be true and his patients are the source of his theory. But what if we replaced the words “Sex Addict” with:
Ashley Madison user
Grinder User
Tinder User
Cheater
Infidel
Adulterer
One time affair
Occasional
Short-term
Long-term
Infidelity by definition is the keeping of secrets
These individuals “Traffic in Denial” and cluelessly misunderstand how their deceit, lying and secrets impact upon their partners and families.
* “A disorder of chronic lying in a family system is pathology regardless of sexual acting out or not”
* “The Victims?”
( terms like “D-Day, infidelity – Tsunami, shrapnel, PTSD, Adultery Bomb, my family’s blow up, Who Are You? Why didn’t I know, How could I not know?What did I do wrong? HEY I didn’t do ANYTHING The overwhelming feelings of social shame etc)
‘The victims of these dynamics of abuse (lies, deceit, secrets) are rendered INVISIBLE.’
Thank you so much for your website and all the women in the “Sisterhood.”
I begin to feel Wings……of hope
V