Written by Should I leave a sex addict? What happens if I do leave a sex addict?
Well, of course, your life changes if you leave a sex addict. And that’s a good thing, but usually it sure doesn’t feel that way. Many partners are reluctant to leave a sex addict because they fear change. And, because of the stress they are under, it is natural to ‘catastrophize’ the change, to imagine the worst scenarios, to doubt your decision or to not be able to make any decision at all and to stay frozen in the familiar. So, should you leave a sex addict? Or should you stay? How will your life change?
Let me tell you what really happens if you leave a sex addict.
- You will feel lonely, often excruciatingly so
- Your finances will change, usually for the worse
- Your lifestyle will be different, often in ways you hate
- You will go through a period of mourning the loss of the relationship
- You will feel depressed and may need short term medication
- You will doubt your decision, often on a daily basis
- You may cry a lot, and that’s a good thing
Then, things will start to change.
- You will notice you have more ‘time’ in your life, even though you have more responsibilities
- You will start to sleep all night
- You will be able to read something and remember what you have read
- You will stop ‘jumping’ at every strange or loud noise
- You will notice more details about the people in your life
- You will become more involved with your loved ones
- People will start acting more friendly toward you
- Your concentration will improve
- You will start to look forward to holidays and celebrations
- Life will seem interesting again
- You will start to trust again
- You will recognize that there are trustworthy people in your world
- You will learn to recognize who is trustworthy and who is not, which means you have learned to trust yourself
- You will become able to reflect without self recrimination
- Your perspective will change
- Your anger will change to understanding and empathy
- You will forgive him and yourself, but you won’t forget the lessons
- You use the experience to grow your coping skills in everyday life
- You will have become normal again
How do I know? It’s happened to me and thousands of women on this site who made the difficult choice to leave.
Wishing peace to all partners. ~ JoAnn