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Help, Support and Resources for

Wives and Partners of Sex Addicts

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Trauma Recovery Video Series

eBooks for Partners

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Who Is JoAnn Russell?

My name is JoAnn Russell. I am a woman, a mother, grandmother and a Registered Nurse with a Masters Degree. In 2004 I started a small blog about my discovery that my husband had a secret dark sexual life. I had no one to talk with, I felt isolated, traumatized and hopeless. Counselors just didn't 'get it' and I refused to accept responsibility for my husband's behaviors that had nothing to do with me and had been going on for most of his adult life. Read More

Our Position

We reject the idea that sex addiction is an actual disease, but rather a series of symptoms and traits that indicate a much deeper mental disorder.

Wives and partners of these misdiagnosed ‘sex addicts’ are victims of domestic abuse.

We support the trauma model of treatment for wives and partners of sex addicts. Read More

What We Believe

We Believe that you, the Partner or wife of a sex addict, are of the utmost importance here in The Sisterhood. Your needs and the needs of any minor children are our top priority. We focus on you and what you need to heal.

We Believe that the very first thing that any Partner or wife must do upon Discovery is to get a full panel of STD tests. Your very life depends upon it.  ALL sex addicts claim that it is ‘just porn’... Read More

The Support Group

The Sisterhood Support Group is an online 24/7 support group for women only. The doors are always open in the 'hood' and the light is always on. It is your quiet, safe place. A place where wives and partners of sex addicts will find honest, truthful answers, resources and most of all, friendship and caring from women who truly understand. Read More

Visit Chump Lady 

Who is Chump Lady? She is the friend who sits with you at 3 in the morning, pours you a bowl of raisin bran, and tells you to LEAVE that motherfucker. You deserve better than this. There’s a GOOD life out there without this jerk in it. Move toward it. You’re going to be just fine on the other side of this nightmare.

Click Here to visit Chump Lady

eBooks

Over the years I have put together a series of eBooks for wives and partners of sex addicts. These eBooks are concise and packed with information. There is no fluff, no long anecdotes, just information, answers and solutions. Read more

One On One Coaching

When the one person you trusted most in this world has just destroyed everything in which you were invested, heart, soul, mind, and body, and you are waiting for test results to tell you what diseases he has given you, it’s not time for a therapist to call you names, ask you how you participated in his lie, suggest it’s not that bad, accuse you of knowing all the time, or tell you it takes two people to ruin a marriage. Traumatized partners of sex addicts need someone who makes their needs the top priority. Read More

A Trauma Recovery Program

First Things First Video Series

About 70% of partners have PTSD. The rest struggle with untreated PTS symptoms every day. Additionally, your health may be damaged by STD’s/STI’s and stress, your financial and/or personal security put in jeopardy, and your hope gone.

In nine videos and accompanying print resources, Diane Strickland presents the topics that have risen to the top as partner priorities....Read More

Free youtube Videos

The Sisterhood has put together informational videos for partners of sex addicts. Please check out our youtube page and if you like what you see please subscribe. And, don't forget to check back often to see what new videos are available.

SOS youtube

Recent Blog Posts

What To Ask Your Therapist

What to Ask Your Therapist Partners often endure further trauma by therapists who want to call us names such as co-dependent, co-addict or co-sex addict. Many therapists claim to use the ‘trauma model’ but want the Partners to share in the blame, commit to staying with the sex addict for a year

What Partners Say About Sex Addiction and Support

What Partners Say-Sisterhood of Support In this new weekly series, 'What Partners Say' I have gleaned the best of the best testimonials from the private forums of what partners say about sex addiction and the support they get from the Sisterhood. These are all anonymous and any personal informatio

Why? A Partner Speaks On Sex Addiction

Why does a man choose hookers over his family? Why didn’t we see this major flaw in our husbands? Why do we stay and have nervous breakdowns when we find out? Why do therapists push us towards acknowledging our part? Why are we triggered? Why can’t we just walk out the door and never look back?

Rate Your Therapist

It is time to publicly rate your therapist. Somehow, some way the 'do no harm' philosophy has been lost on CSATs and therapists who counsel sex addicts and their partners. I hear story after story after story of blame shifting, name calling and outright deception and lying about the therapists undis

‘Sexual Sobriety’ Leaves Victims Untreated by Dr. Minwalla

This article, by Dr. Minwalla echoes what we, at the Sisterhood, have been saying for years. Dr. Omar Minwalla is the only professional who really seems to understand the complexity and scope of this thing we call 'sex addiction'. This article is so important it should be posted on every Partner's r

Written by a Sister

Written by a Sister who wishes to remain anonymous... “The heart wants what it wants - or else it does not care.” No, that was not Woody Allen, (although he did quote an obscene version of it as a way to justify running off with his adopted daughter). It was Emily Dickinson, my favorite poet. Sh

Is There Really a ‘Better Than Ever’ After Discovery?

We have had some interesting discussions in the Sisterhood forums as to whether or not women can find happiness after discovering that they are in a relationship with a sex addict and if their marriage can be better than ever. The phrase that 12 steppers, therapists  and Intensive Therapy programs

A Relaxation Gift for My Sisters

As you know from my previous post I am working on some audio tapes to help you relax and feel good about yourselves during this stressful time after Discovery and while trying to make those difficult decisions. Well, if you add the holidays to the mix and we are all basket cases. Here is a short tap

Abuse is Abuse is Abuse

The news coverage of Ray Rice brutally beating his fiancee unconscious has brought back a flood of memories for me. I was a teen in the 60's and fought long and hard, alongside other courageous women, to win basic rights. Our right to be treated at least as well as animals does not seem to apply to

Please Sisters, Protect Our Privacy

I shouldn't have to say this, but I guess I do. Sisters, this website is very private. All of the Sisters depend upon and trust each other to keep our safe place safe. Yet, once in a while,our safety is violated by a snooping husband. Even worse is when our safety is violated by a Sister herself. Ou

The Truth About Lying

Some Partners have said that you can always tell when a Sex Addict is lying--because their lips are moving. Unfortunately, that is true. Most Sex Addicts lie out of simple self preservation, preservation of the facade that they present. Let's think about it. These guys have lied all of their lives.

Debunking The ‘Men Are Genetically Programmed To Cheat’ Theory

Honestly, I get so sick of reading and hearing over and over that men are genetically programmed to cheat. Those espousing this theory claim that men are programmed to spread their seed far and wide in order to ensure the survival of the species. Just like other male based thought processes, this on

Sex Addictions And Brain Changes–Which Came First?

Note: I wrote this in 2013. Watch for updates. ~ JoAnn Although I have not been able to find any serious research papers on frontal lobe volume loss in sex addicts, there are more than enough professional opinions out there that claim that sex addicts exhibit the same changes in their brains as othe

The 5% Recovery Myth For Sex Addicts

Although the Sex Addiction gurus, like Carnes and Weiss, claim that any Sex Addict can change and recover if they really want to, and some even claim a 100% success rate, those of us who have lived and researched the behaviors that are called Sex Addiction know that is just not possible. Yet even th

If They Are Not Really Addicts Why Do We Call Them Sex Addicts?

The debate of whether Sex Addiction is really an addiction will not be settled soon, especially while expensive treatment centers continue to offer five figure 'cures'. I have stated for years that I do not believe that the compulsive sexual behaviors that these so called Sex Addicts engage in are n

Serial Recovery?

Here on the Sisterhood we have all acknowledged the narcissistic, self-indulgent behaviors of Sex Addicts. But, there is a strange behavior that I have noticed in Larry, and in some of the stories that I have read. I am not sure what to call it, but I know it exists. In fact, it almost seems like 'S

Ten Things To Help Partners Of Sex Addicts Deal With Holiday Stress

The Holiday Season is upon us and for Partners of Sex Addicts the stress can become unbearable.  Here's a few ideas to help you through the Holidays and deal with all that holiday stress. Ahhhh...the holiday season. Blinking colored lights everywhere, crowded malls, shopping lists, noise, everyone

He’s A Sex Addict! Should I Stay Or Go?

When I started my first website almost a decade ago my mission was to offer women who were in a relationship with a Sex Addict the information and resources that I did not have when I made my Discovery. Information that would have helped me decide if I should stay or go. I made my decisions without

Cave Men And Pharmaceuticals

As if we women don't have enough societal hurdles and hoops to jump through, here we have what appears to be a sensible review of a new book that exposes the greed driven practices of  pharmaceutical companies that want to make women's normalcy and uniqueness an illness so they can sell us pills to

Porn Is Just A Typo Away

Here's why everyone should monitor their children's internet activity.* -The average age of someone finding porn online is 11. -Sex and Porn are among the top 5 search terms for kids under 18. -Only 3% of adult web sites require age verification. -Fewer than half (48 percent) of U.S. parents set par

Check out Diane's new affordable audio resource! 'Ten Tough Questions' for partners and wives of sex addicts! 

Find Out More!   

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